Well as most of you know, that is me right now facing the big “D”. I will be the first to admit I never wanted it and dang sure didn’t expect it. Sometimes you are put in a situation though, that you just can’t deny that it is the only option. I have cried, screamed, prayed and even bartered to keep my marriage. In the end though, I guess he is making it easy on me for saying that he won’t change. Pride will be his downfall and my push to do what I probably should have done long ago. I can only pick myself up and make the best of what I am about to embark on. Is there ever an easy way to get a divorce and split up the accumulations of a marriage, no, never. I will leave with the bare essentials and forget the rest. It isn’t worth it to me to fight for half of everything like people keep telling me. After all, this is the man I married and loved, and still do. Why would I want to treat it like a freak side show, just to get justice? No, there is a higher power that will make him answer for his part in this. I, however, will be the bigger person and take what is needed to live and move on with my life. I can’t make someone be something they don’t want to be or can’t be, so I will do what I can with me and only me to make it. Lives will be changed and people will be hurt, but it isn’t worth it to me to cause any of that intentionally. You put on your big girl panties and you suck up that pride that wants to make him pay, and you take the high road. God did not make me to be vengeful and hateful, he made me to love and forgive. So that is what I will do and away I go on this new chapter that has yet to be written and I can only be the character that God directs on this new journey. So what do you do when going through the big “D”? Whatever it takes to heal and move on and be the better person. Forgive and love as God loved us. Karma and God will deal with him/her.

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